I believe that our lives are separated by decades of learning. They are so expertly crafted to help us develop our authentic, most blissful existence. I love being a midlife woman and am grateful for what this current decade offers me; an opportunity to do it my way. It hasn’t always been an easy journey and the lessons have been hard to swallow at times. Never the less, they were needed to strengthen my moxie muscle. There were many times that I didn’t understand the “why” in my journey.
Looking back, I think I may have a clue.
My twinkle toes twenties – A decade filled with fearless, reckless abandon. It was all about the fun. I blush now at some of the idiotic things that I did. One night, fueled by alcohol, I went through a drive through topless (my girlfriends and I thought it was hilarious). I laughed off close calls and bad decisions. I think all twenty-year-olds have an assigned angel to save them from themselves.
Lesson Learned: Consequences catch up with you and to think BEFORE you act.
My turbulent thirties- A decade filled with the feeling that I was barely holding on . I was in a marriage that suffocated me and felt clinically depressed most days. I felt that I dreamed too big and wanted too much. The mask I wore had a smile, but my eyes were dead. This was my crossroads decade where I would continue as is or break free. I chose to break free.
Lesson Learned: If your life sucks, there are changes to be made. You have the power.
My fortified forties- A decade filled with nurturing and being the household glue. I no longer had babies in the house, but three busy girls that had very busy schedules. I maintained the routine of the calendar and ensured that each member was in the appropriate place at the appropriate time. My needs were an afterthought. My focus was outwards. There were times that resentment set in , but it wasn’t acknowledged. I took pride in my gang and lived vicariously through their endeavors.
Lesson Learned: Mom’s need to Mom, but making that role your identity is a disaster waiting to happen.
My fabulous fifties- A decade filled with options. I’ve learned how to give myself permission to “do me”. I listen to the butterflies in my stomach to guide my decisions. Some may call that intuition. =) There’s a realization that every day is a gift that must be devoured whole. You plan what your next chapter will entail.
Lesson Learned (so far): I am worthy of a life on my terms. I have gifts that the world needs.
Article contributed by Maria Allyn, MS